I've Had a Blessed Life, but Not a Charmed Life

 As I get older, I have become more reflective, and this includes various episodes of my life; my experiences.  I am thankful for my blessings, and I have many.  I have blessings that I take for granted and don't even notice on a day to day basis.  It's only when I search my past with reflection and introspection, that I notice these things.

I have not led a charmed life.  I never was the most popular kid, or even a member of a popular group of people.  If anything, my friends seems to be the outcasts.  I certainly did not lead the charmed life, and even into adulthood, I have been aware that I have to earn everything I have, including respect, and even when "earning" whatever it is, that doesn't always mean that I will get it.  Life is not fair.

I remember things that I had hidden away in the back of my mind, because although trivial in the grand view of life, they were hurtful episodes.  Lately, I have thought of a time not long after I married my wife.  We had gotten a phonecall about a group of friends that were getting together for lunch and would we like to join them.  We live 25 minutes south of Tulsa, but we got ready quickly and made it to the restaurant in less than an hour.

When we arrived at the restaurant, the bulk of the group of friends had already eaten, and in fact, and settled their bill and were leaving.  We had just gotten there and hadn't even had a chance to order a meal.  It felt like no one (of my friends) were going to stay there and talk to my wife and I.  They were busy and were leaving.

Why did they invite us?  They could've just had their lunch together and not included us, and that would've been better than this insult.

I remember how it always was with on of my friends and his wife.  For the bulk of the time I knew him, any time we were going anywhere, we always had to wait on his wife.  She was notoriously late, and she was slow to get ready.  And yet, the group of us always waited.  That's just the way it was.

But now I saw that these same friends would not give my wife the same patience that the other guy's wife had received over the years.  It became another reminder to me that I was never like other people.  Other people had friends, and I had mostly acquaintenaces that I thought of as friends.  I believed that because it was necessary not to see it for what it was.  I was never as good as everyone else; no matter how hard I tried.

This wasn't an isolated incident.  It was just another in a long history of how things were for me growing up, and although you put these things away and move on, from time to time, life gives you another reason to remember that you're just not as good as everyone else.

Some might look at this and feel that it's a lack of forgiveness on my part, that I still hold on to these things.  Part of that might even be true.  The I feel like a lot of it is just a part of what has formed me into the person that I am today.  I feel like I need to be the best person I can be; to be the best friend that I can be, but also know that the world is not fair; and that people will probably never treat me as well as I treat them.  It's just how things are, and I have learned to live with it.

Most of the time, I just put these things in the back of my mind and look forward to good things in the future.  But every now and then, I am reminded. 

HR Isn't the Employee's Friend

 Over the years of working in corporate settings, I have experienced enough turmoil as management changed and organizations evolved.  Although when I first started out, I really viewed HR (Human Resources) as the employee's friend (advocate).  But I soon learned that this is not true, and I notice over and over young workers that also have the perception of HR as a friend.  HR is not your friend.

HR is there for the purpose of protecting the company (not you) from lawsuits and bad PR.  It is true that in some cases, they can help with disputes over company policy and how it might affect an employee, or how lower management might violate policy.  But higher in the management change, it is clear that company policy applies less and less.  Employees are not protected.

You need to know that in most cases, if you have a dispute with management over their treatment of you, the truth is that you are on your own.

I have seen cases where employees would have some sort of agreement signed when they were first hired by the company, on the job responsibilities and mission that they were being hired for.  But as time goes by, they were clearly being put in situations that the agreement never applied to.  And the truth is, that "agreement" is not a legally binding contract.  If the employee doesn't like it, they can voice their concerns (professionally and politely), but if their concerns fall on deaf ears, there is little they can do, and there is nothing that HR is going to do to help them.  At that point, they either need to adapt to the new environment, or look for another job.

And sometimes, getting another jobs just means that the clock is ticking at the new job, where they will be put into the same or similar conditions that are unacceptable to the employee.

The bottom line is that the corporate organization does not care about the employee.  HR does not care about the employee.  You are on your own.  Adapt or move on.

 

Should Transgender Women Be Allowed To Compete In Women's Sports?

 The topic of transgender issues, especially in sports, has been a common subject recently.  I've been reluctant to chime in just because I know some transgender women, and feel sensitive to their feelings on the matter.  However, I feel I finally do need to say something, just to add some perspective.

First of all, I feel sensitive to these people.  Anyone (teenage or older) with what is known as gender dysphoria, have a tough time getting through life.  People don't understand them.  Even their own families don't understand them.  I can see this being a very, very lonely existence.  And I've seen that even in the case where they are in a community of LGBTQ groups, often times they are even rejected there when it comes to dating or even having more than a casual relationship.  So the loneliness doesn't go away.

And I make a distinction between transgender women, who are men who have had surgery and transitioned to be women; and then there are a broader group of men who "identify" as being a women, although have not had the surgery, and may never have the surgery.

Where this applies to women's sports is where I feel the line needs some attention.  Generally speaking, males have more testosterone than females.  This gives a young male an advantage on growing and building muscles as he grows up.  And after training for years and eventually transitioning to female, this advantage doesn't go away.  This person has an unfair advantage over the women who have trained their whole lives without the higher levels of testosterone, and so their muscles and athletic performance suffers in comparison.

Women who would otherwise make the team, suddenly are edged out, because someone who benefitted from testosterone during those formative years, has edged them out.  It isn't fair.

Consider that currently, no sanctioning organization allowed for females to take testosterone injections to enhance their abilities through the years.  So they don't even get a chance for enhancement, whereas the person that transitions from male to female, does get the enhancement.  It's not fair.

The whole point of women's sports, is so that girls and women would be able to compete just like the boys and men do.  It is not fair for them to be elite athletes in their field, only to be edged out by someone who was born male.  And in many cases, the transgender women, as a male, if competing against men, wouldn't even be able to make the men's team.

And if you think it is fair, consider that we don't see females transitioning to male, and then wanting to compete in men's sports.  It wouldn't make sense.

Testosterone is an advantage.

Like I said before, I sympathize with the life of a person that doesn't feel at ease in their own bodies.  But in my opinion, transitioned or just identifying as a female, I think if they have XY chromosomes, they should be competing against other athletes with that same set of chromosomes.  That is the more fair approach. 

The American System Aint Perfect, But It's the Best Thing We've Ever Had

 It feels like lately, it appears that more and more people are attracted to socialism (or even communism).  It's like they have contempt for the American system, despite the fact that socialism (and communism) has never worked in the history of the human race (not long term).  Everywhere that those systems have been tried, it has pushed the majority of the people into poverty, and power to a select corrupt few.

The American system has brought more people out of poverty (not just in the United States, but elsewhere in the world) than any other system in history.  And although it is true that power seems to fall into the hands of a select corrupt few, that does not discount the fact that more people have been elevated in lifestyle with this system (led by the corrupt, or not).

Unlike the totalitarian systems of socialism and communism, at least the American system has a built in system to expose and remove the corrupt.  From time to time, corrupt politicians go to jail.  From time to time, even the rich end up going too far, get caught, and end up in jail.  It happens.  It doesn't happen in those other systems.

The critics of the American system, complain that the system doesn't work for the people on the bottom.  This criticism ignores the fact that even the people on the bottom live a better lifestyle than the poor in any other country in the world (in history).  The poor in the United States have assistance programs that provide meals, shelter.  and although they don't have healthcare directly, they all have some form of healthcare in emergency rooms at hospitals all over the country.

The critics assume that all the things that we have in this country are just here and have always been here.  They ignore the sacrifices and the work and the struggles that people before us went through to give us these things.  The paved roads we have, didn't just happen.  People made them happen. Businesses made those things available to us, and there were people that sacrificed so that they could create those businesses, create those products, so that we'd have these things.  People gained jobs because of those businesses.

Prior to this age where almost everyone works for someone else, or some company.  Before the economy as it is now, most people were self employed.  They had to have some skill(s) that they could use to create value in the form of a product or service that other people would pay for.  There was no safety net for people who had few or no marketable skills.

As average people sacrificed and saved, and came up with innovations, they used their savings, created companies and employed people.  Some of these companies and products failed.  But a few succeeded, and slowly our economy evolved where the average worker had a 40 hour week, and a paycheck every two weeks.  And we have a social safety net now for the people at the bottom with little or no skill; including people that have bad habits and can't keep a job.  The system even provides for them in a limited way.

None of that just happened.  People made it happen.  Our system allowed people the freedom and incentive to try new things until they found things (products) that worked.  That has benefited the majority of the people in ways that the old system never did.  Under the old system, almost everyone was poor.  A whole middle class evolved out of the innovations that the American system provided for.  Everyone has benefited in some way.  Everyone is better off than the average worker was a hundred and fifty years earlier.

Every time I hear about the corruption that is out there, I am sometimes encouraged that they get caught, exposed, humiliated, and occasionally jailed.  And I keep coming back to the fact that none of the people that complain about this system, would be better off with the system we had a hundred and fifty years ago, and they wouldn't be better off with socialism or communism; and this is proven when looking at those as they are practiced in places like Venezuala.

Some of the detractors will point to certain countries and claim those are shining examples of socialism, but then if you look at those countries, they are not really practicing full socialism (yet), but every one of them is failing economically.  Their economy cannot support those systems long term, and many have had to scale back some of the social programs they initially had that made people support them.

Regardless of those countries though, the fact is still that the American system (with all of its faults), has still brought more people out of poverty, than any other system in the history of the human race.  This is an undisputed fact. 

I don't do video

 From time to time, people ask me to video various events.  I rarely (very rarely) do that.  I really don't like doing video.  In my opinion, almost anyone can take video.  The real magic that sets the pros apart from the amateur is knowing what angles to use and keeping perspective (without correction).  Plus, the pros are good at doing the actual editing of the video.

None of that interests me.

From an artistic viewpoint, I like shooting photographs so much more.  It's a challenge to get the emotion and the essence of a moment.  The action is captured with the emotion, whereas with video, there's no magic in capturing the action.  Anyone can do it.  The camera does it for you, and you just have to keep perspective (the true vertical and horizontal perspective) for it to feel professional.

I know I'm over simplifying what good video is, and the talent that it takes to be a good videographer.  It's just that none of that interests me.

I've done video a few times.  But for the most part, I just don't do it.

 

Lightroom: White Balance

 In the past, I have used custom white balance based off of a white balance card, and I've also dialed in the kelvin color temperature.  There are pros and cons to both of these.  I thought I'd briefly revisit this subject.

In the most recent years, I've taken a simpler approach.  I have shot most of my work using auto white balance in the camera, and then adjusting white balance in post processing (mostly in Lightroom).  As it turns out, this is much easier, and in the end, with modern cameras, it's probably just as accurate in most shooting scenarios.

I think I will continue to work this way for the foreseeable future.

 

Covid Took a Part of My Life That I Haven't Gotten Back

 I'm a bit frustrated.  Covid came along and cancelled hockey season in the middle of it.  But then hockey returned the following season with restrictions.  As a result, I was not allowed event level access at Tulsa Oiler games.  That meant no access to the photo holes.

It went this way for a whole season, and I was led to believe that it would be temporary, and that eventually things would return to normal.  However, the following season, we had similar restrictions, although there was a team photographer that had floor access (event level access) and could use the photo holes.  Not only that, but visiting photographers from other teams, and even bloggers with inactive blogs were able to get access.  Just not me.

I'm frustrated.

I did some of the research to find out the specs for the photo holes and worked with another photographer to lobby to get the photo holes in the first place.  The other photographer is no longer coming to the games, but I'm still there.  and I don't get access to the photo holes.

I'd be fine with this arrangement, but it's getting harder and harder to find an empty seat along the glass, as well as clean glass.  A lot of the glass has so many smears, that I can't get good photos.  I end up throwing away a lot of what would be great shots, if not for the smears.

I have also noticed that another photographer is lately getting some access that I'm not getting.  I'm not against him having access, but sure wish I could get access.  The idea that my status as media, has been diminished because I'm part-time, as opposed to full-time media (the newspaper) who rarely show up at games.

The "full-time media" get access to the photo holes, but I don't.

I'd give anything to be able to use one of the photo holes for just one period a game.  I fear that I might not live long enough to get my life back.